School report – part 2

At the beginning of this year, we changed schools. And we now find ourselves looking forward to mid-term break next week of our second term at the new school. Time has given me some perspective on our experiences so far with schooling, and I thought it high time for a little school report.

Friday afternoon treat

Friday afternoon treat. The kids are wearing their African wax print ‘Friday uniform’. Fridays in Ghana are designated ‘Traditional dress Friday’, and it is typical to see many people dressed in traditional wax print. It was started to boost the Ghanaian textile industry, and it is always gorgeous to see people dressed in the multicoloured traditional prints.

By far the biggest stress of our move to Ghana has been schooling. With many, many aspects of our move, with hindsight I can see how naive we were. And our school experience has been an excellent example of this naivety.

For the first few months of our life in Ghana, we spent it settling into our semi-rural life in Konongo. During this time, our youngest, was due to start primary school in Australia. So we decided homeschooling was the best option. Despite my concerns that they would be falling behind, and the anxiety related to this, I now see we wasted so much energy and emotion; when they were, of course, fine. We are both very big believers in the importance of school for socialisation; but we thought, in our naivety that our kids would make friends with other kids on the mine site; and socialise through that. We could not have comprehended the cultural differences which existed between our kids and those on the mine site. And we all tried hard, really hard. But it very soon became apparent that the local kids saw our place as a giant toy shop; which of course, that is what it was. But, they had no interest in actually playing with our kids, which was depressing for all of us. Our children retreated into themselves and their games; and visits from the local kids fell by the wayside. And it was the nature of play that was so different as well. Our kids love playing make believe games, dressing up and running around the garden. This was totally alien to the local kids, and the only middle ground was found by jumping on the trampoline. But 15 kids all boisterously jumping on a trampoline simultaneously does not fun make.

After a few months with exceptionally little outside social contact, we decided to try school. Our first school is situated in Kumasi, but on the outskirts. An hours drive away, it was the closest option for what we hoped would be a good education. It is a private Ghanainan school, teaching the Ghanaian curriculum. Which, in many aspects is much like the British system; with the exception of Ghanaian language as compulsory. The school is very well equipped, with a swimming pool and amazing music room. The heads of school all said the right things in our interview with them, and we felt quite comfortable in our choice. Despite them wanting to hold the children back a year as their Ghanaian and French language skills were lacking, we pushed very hard for them to remain in their correct classes, and I am so pleased we did. But all the ‘right words’ in an interview cannot prepare you for the reality.

A typical government school; which puts our issues in perspective.

A typical government school; which puts our issues in perspective.

And this is where we were naive in not recognising that cultural differences can be profoundly reflected in school pedagogy, and on a very basic level as to how children are treated. We were naive to think that as the only ‘obrunis’ (whites) in the school, given a short period of settling in, the children would be accepted as one of the group. While they all made friends at the school, they were teased, touched, and weirdly, their friends were ridiculed for being friends with the obruni. Thankfully these lovely friends all let it wash over them. Stranger still was some teachers reactions, swinging from calling Jock ‘obruni’ to his face (it’s not that hard to remember the one new kids name in class), to punishing all the other children in the class, apart from the obruni. Then the stories of other children being punished in the class started to come home. While the school said it had a no hitting policy, this was not always adhered to, and other punishments included kneeling on the floor holding a chair above their heads for half an hour! Equally depressing were punishments focussed on shaming a student; with other students encouraged to publicly shame the guilty party.

I appreciate that all sounds shocking to those of us used to ‘Western’ schools, but for many people, this, and far worse is reality. And perhaps there are those who would say it toughens the kids up. Perhaps, but not me.

Questioning authority is the unwritten ‘Second Amendment’ to the Australian psyche. But in no way was this encouraged. For a long time I struggled with a general unease about the nature of schooling. And that was quite apart from the punishments; which I felt a very bloody direct sense of unease about. I understand and fully respect the importance of good schooling, particularly in a developing country, where education is the only way out. But this was manifest in an intense seriousness about exams and learning of facts. Fun was not a part of the learning experience. A young woman training to be a teacher here laughed at me when I complained that school was not fun. School is not about fun, it’s about learning.

And that’s the whole crux of the problem. With this intense focus on exams and passing, the students were often stressed. School was not fun. Even our youngest, in Kindergarten had to sit exams, and ‘graduate’ to year one. And there were constant reminders to “Be Serious”. And then the hypocrisy of teachers not attending class because they were ‘busy’. Parents were not allowed to attend assemblies, assist in classroom activities (like reading with the young students). Indeed, we were not allowed to enter the school building except on one open day. Outside of ensuring homework was completed, we were not partners in our children’s education; we were customers.

We experienced a fundamental gap in our beliefs of what made learning effective.

I spoke (endlessly) to friends and teachers in Australia gave me much of their valuable time to listen to my concerns and help clarify our options. Thankfully my eldest had the sense to complain to us bitterly, and she returned to homeschooling. The straw that broke the camels back was when our middle child slipped out that a teacher had playfully hit her on the back of the head in class, hitting her nose on the desk, and in this humid climate she got a nose bleed. Enough was enough.

This set off a chain of events, resulting in the children and I moving to Kumasi during the week, and seeing Bill on the weekends, on some levels defeating the purpose of the move to Ghana. We started at a new school, a true International school. There are literally hundreds of schools here which claim internationality in their names, but very few follow an international curriculum. We have 30 nationalities at the school; and while most students are Ghanainan, many have travelled or lived overseas. And I can’t tell you what a difference it makes, to be different from each other, but share some commonalities. And no one calls us obruni.

The different nationalities are a very interesting mix, with students from countries as far afield as Côte D’Ivoire, Senegal, Nigeria, Lebanon, Korea, Japan, India and, of course, Australia. The curriculim studies the differences (and similarities) between host and home countries. And while there is still a seriousness about school work, it is cleverly manifest in such a different way. Lessons, particularly for the younger ones, are hands on. There is explicit communication that parents are partners in education, and extra lessons are given to those who are struggling. Rather than a directive in her school report to “Buck up” which was all the assistance our middle child was given in her Ghanaian language studies at the old school.

Of course there are still cultural differences, but these (while sometimes confusing) are to be expected. The classes are loud, and at times boisterous; but on the whole the children are very welcoming of new students. There is a real affection between them, constant calls of hello, holding hands, and the boys often walk with their arms about each others shoulders. We are loving the middle school concept, which does’t exist in Australia. It has given our eldest a greater sense of responsibility and reawakened a happy competitive streak in class. There is more homework than in Australia, but it is accepted (and completed!) and while everyone still writes exams, more than are probably necessary, they are not infused with major stress or dread. And while the facilities do not compare to the old school, we have learnt , while highly desirable, their presence doesn’t guarantee a good school.

swings

I know there is no such thing as a perfect school. Parents inherently have their own children’s interests at heart, and in this emotionally charged setting, it is impossible to please everyone all the time. And parents who have themselves come from very varied school experiences; the majority of which attending school similar to what I have described above. But I witnessed a very interesting dialogue at a PTA meeting I attended during the week.

The topic was textbooks, and a perceived inadequacy of the current textbooks. Parents questioned whether the teachers were happy with the current books; and at some point in the conversation a teacher admitted that for some subjects, such as social science; there was not a ‘perfect’ textbook. Parents were up in arms, suggesting the teachers should be writing and publishing their own textbooks.  The teachers thought, as did I, their time would  be better spent preparing for and teaching class, than writing textbooks. But it struck at the heart of the matter. In the evolution of education, the parents were stuck in the same system that they had experienced; that it was possible to learn everything for a particular subject, for a particular year, from a particular book.

The head of primary schools eloquent response summed up all the unease I had felt about our experience. She said ‘We are not about learning every single fact inside a particular book. We are about teaching the children to question and to learn from their own experiences, to make learning an everyday part of their lives, not just something they do at school.’

I wish them well. Whether a country needs to escape the trap of poverty or to make a more humane world for our children’s children, the education needs to be about questioning and learning; not recitation of facts.

 

Top ten tips for living in a developing country.

Ghanaian market

Ghanaian market

Hi!

Are you thinking about moving to a developing country? Have you already moved?

I’ve written an article on The top 10 tips of moving to a developing country over at Expat Quotes. The site provides information, guides and other services for expatriates around the world, with a global section and information on hundreds of individual countries. Their sister sites EasyExpat and BlogExpat provide a ton of information too.

I’d love your thoughts, do you agree with my tips? What would you suggest?

In other news:

I’ve been having fun with my 30 days of photographs over at Instagram. It has certainly got me taking more photos, so I’m happy with that.

 

30 days of photographs

Pillow manDo you know TED Talks?

I love them. They are such a wonderful reminder of all the amazing people in the world, just so inspirational. The children and I have taken to streaming a TED talk each morning during the half hour drive to school. The talks invariably open our eyes to the possibilities of the world and the future. And this could be more important, they show that to achieve something amazing, you do have to work really hard and be really persistent.

Our favourites have been Caleb Chung, who is a toy inventor. He actually made Furby, amongst many others. We also loved  Arthur Benjamin’s Mathemagic. Just google ‘TED talks for kids’.

But what’s up with the guy with the pillows on his head? Well, I realise I seem to have stopped taking photos here in Ghana. Which is nuts because the streets are full of amazing scenes, which we would never see in Australia. (As an aside, I always ask before I take a photo and many people here don’t want their photograph taken, fair enough too). I joined Instagram a few months ago, and while I love the concept, I haven’t really got into it. So, when I found this TED talk by Matt Cutts on making changes, however small, to your life, I thought it was time for a 30 day photography challenge.

So for the month of May I’m posting a photo a day on Instagram, with the hashtag #30days. You can find all my photos here. Feel free to join in!

The Gold Coast

Axim Beach

Axim Beach

Pretty stunning huh?

Did you know Ghana’s pre-independence name was the Gold Coast? This catchy moniker has been copied around the world, but none compares to the original. Named not for gold bikini clad meter maids (like Australia’s gold coast), but by the Europeans who were stunned at the amount of gold that came from this part of the Gulf of Guinea. Indeed, the gold is the reason that we are here.

Over the Easter break, with 2 other families, we made the 7 hour journey from Kumasi, down to the Cape Coast, and across to Axim Beach.

When we first moved to Ghana a South African friend gave me a sage piece of advice, which always makes me smile.

Remember, you are never alone in Africa. Think you can nip into the bush for a quick toilet stop unnoticed…think again!

Hotel and beach

But, despite it being Easter Thursday, this was the view that greeted us. The surf was so rough, had we been in our seaside home of Newcastle (Australia) we wouldn’t have braved the waves; but desperate for the soothing touch of the ocean, we all jumped in. And stayed in, for hours. Come Easter Friday, the hotel had filled up, and the beach was busier, but it never reached a bustling sea of humanity we have grown used to, like Kejetia Markets; or Bondi Beach on a Sunday in summer.

Axim Beach

The hotel is situated on a small peninsula, and the accomodation are fetching cottages with thatched roofs. While the rooms were simple, the verandah was wide, and the view was divine. It really did change my opinion of Ghana, that it could be, in places, a tropical paradise. We spent many hours sitting and chatting and sharing cold beers.

View from verandah

But, the many hours of sitting on the verandah, was largely waiting for food. Customer service is notoriously bad in Ghana, and a 2-3 hour wait for a meal was, unfortunately, standard. We even tried to circumvent this, by ringing 2 hours ahead of when we were ready to eat. And yet, we still waited 2 hours after the designated time. With 7 kids in tow, the fun soon wears off.

Advice from an experienced expat should never be ignored. So when my Italian friend told me she brought all her food from home when she travelled for a weekend; I thought that doesn’t sound like a weekend off from the kitchen to me, and so I just brought snack food. More the fool me. When we caught up with the said Italian friend a few days later at Elima; and ate her feast under the stars; I swore I would never rely on hotel food in Ghana again.

It is a real shame, as the hotel was picturesque, the beach was a salve to the urban jungle of Kumasi, the Easter weekend entertainment provided by a dance-drumming group from Côte D’Ivoire was exotic, and the company (because I know you are reading this!) was….ok. (hahahaha).

Here is a fairly average video of the Ivoirean dance-drumming group. They were great: super energetic and who doesn’t love African drumming?

After a visit from the Easter Bunny on Sunday, we headed east to Elmina. The plan was to break the return journey and to visit the Cape Coast Castle and Kakum Nature Reserve.

Towns along the Cape Coast

This stretch of coast, about 3 hours west of Accra; is named Cape Coast. It houses some of the best preserved slave forts along the entire West African Coast.

Elmina Castle

Imposing whitewashed structures, perched on cliffs along the coast; they have been occupied by the Portugeuse, the Dutch, the Danish and lastly the British. Started as forts for the export of gold, lumber and other products; their use by Europeans soon became the depraved trade in human beings.

Cape Coast Castle

Up to 250 men were held in this room.

Up to 250 men were held in this room.

The infamous Door of No Return.

The infamous Door of No Return.

The children were allowed on the tour with us, which despite the horrific nature of the events which took place there, we felt it important for them to have a sense of a defining part of West Africa’s history. It is impossible to understand how it all could have happened.

We stayed at Coconut Grove Beach Resort, which is a total old school holiday destination, complete with Spanish Hacienda style architecture. It has a pool, golf course, petting zoo, horse rides on the beach and crocodile enclosure! True! Staying only one night there, and not availing ourselves of the restaurant, I can only say it would be a fun place to spend a few days, particularly if you are a golf nut, or have kids, or both!

Kakum Forest Walk

The next morning we headed to the busiest national park in Ghana; Kakum National Park. And I can see why it is so popular, it was great. Bushwalking anywhere in the ‘Christian’ world on Easter weekend, is bound to be busy, but I swear half of Ghana was there, and apart from us; it seemed everyone was on a Church ‘Fun Club’ weekend away.

Crowds on canopy

While it is possible to walk on the forest floor, the drawcard of the park is to walk on 7 suspended bridges through the canopy. The bridges are narrow ladders, with planks laid over them, and held aloft by rope work netting. It’s high, it’s wobbly and quite freaky. The crowd, though massive, was good natured; and the shrieks and nervous giggles added to to atmosphere. Needless to say, with all that noise, not much wildlife was on show.

But the vision of a shrieking nun in a blue habit walking across the bridges will stay with me forever.

We all needed a good sit down after the excitement of the canopy walk.

We all needed a good sit down after the excitement of the canopy walk.

Mumbo Italiano

Italian chairs

I thought I’d better give a little recap of our whirlwind trip to Italy before it all becomes a very pleasant, but distant memory.

Did you know that there are direct flights from Accra to Rome? Isn’t that awesome? And the flight is only just over 5 hours. When as Australians we are used to 24+hrs to Europe, it’s just such a thrill.

"Can you believe we are actually in Venice!!!"

“Can you believe we are actually in Venice!!!”

So, after our short flight, and about 2 hours sleep, we headed straight to Roma Termini train station, and boarded a fast train to Venice. Exhaustion was temporarily overcome by the sheer prettiness of Venice, the crazy thrill of all that water, and the gratuitous joy of being back in the developed world.

The Bridge of Sighs, and gelato.

The Bridge of Sighs, and gelato.

It was welcoming cool (cold even!), but a little damp. We wandered the streets, and stared open-mouthed at it all. We ate gelato, we ate pizza, we ate pasta. I sold a kidney and we took a gondola ride, and amazed at how gently the gondolier steered the boat through the narrow back canals. We climbed bell towers. As a last minute decision, we caught a water bus to Murano, the glass blowing island. And really, it was the surprise hit of the holiday. The children loved watching the glass-blowing demonstration; the paper bursting into flame as it was touched to the still hot sculpture; the glass balloon shattering as it was blown and blown. Jock even considered changing his long term plans for becoming a blacksmith, to being a glass-blower. For the record he has come back to the more “useful” (his word) profession of blacksmithing. And I managed to score a beautiful vase; justified by being 50% off, and doing my bit to help the Italian economy.

Lill and some beautiful glass flowers, Murano.

Lill and some beautiful glass flowers, Murano.

Pasta shop, as pretty as any lolly shop.

Pasta shop, as pretty as any lolly shop.

When you travel, do you play the game of wondering what it would be like to live where you are? I’m chronic for it. Economic and life realities aside, isn’t it great fun? Which area would you choose to live in? Where would be your local coffee shop? I love it. And I almost always feel I can live somewhere. Alas, Venice, for all your beauty; left me feeling a little disoriented. But you did made me feel a whole lot better about the rising damp issues in our Australian house.

Putting my rising damp issues to rest, San Marco's Basilica.

Putting my rising damp issues to rest, San Marco’s Basilica.

We're here. Really, really here! Happy days.

We’re here. Really, really here! Happy days.

I’ve been wanting to go to Florence since I was a teenager, crazy, absolutely crazy, about the film (and book) Room with a View. So, my teenage plans of running away to Florence with Julian Sands didn’t involve being there with 3 children, and no Julian; but I still loved it. We made bad jokes along the lines of “There Arno rivers prettier” [the river in Florence is the Arno]; we survived the 6000 Madonna and Child paintings in the Uffizi (most importantly, the six year old boy survived them); we wandered over Pointe Vecchio and ate the best gelato ever (me: cottage cheese and pear, followed up with mojito. The kids were more traditional and stuck with lemon, chocolate and strawberry). And, the stair climbing continued. We climbed the campanile and the Duomo; the tower at Palazzo Vecchio, and imagined throwing hot oil down on invaders. We all loved the ‘story’ of Florence; it was great for the children to see the Medici treasures of the Uffizi, then visit their ‘apartments’ at Palazzo Vecchio; and then stare in open mouthed wonder at the ‘Chapel of the Princes’. The wealth, power, and (let’s be honest) the corruption of a family was unbelievable.

Lill likes Florence too.

Lill likes Florence too.

Another day, another tower to climb. This is is Palazzio Vecchio, Florence.

Another day, another tower to climb. This is the tower at Palazzo Vecchio, Florence.

Yes, more climbing. Inside the Duomo.

Yes, more climbing. Inside the Duomo.

Burning off some of the gelato, Sante Croce.

Burning off some of the gelato, Santa Croce.

We loved the paper stores, and the girls obsessed about feather quills and emerald green ink (Harry Potter fans indeed). Jock loved wandering the streets the finding new towers he planned on climbing.

Florence is a city I could live in. Like tomorrow.

[For those die hard Room with a View fans, you can stream the entire movie on YouTube here.]

And then Rome. I had foolishly expected a kind of upmarket version of Athens. And no offence Athens, I really do love you with all my heart, but I didn’t expect Rome to be so beautiful; beautiful architecture, beautiful fountains and squares, and of course beautiful churches. And I think Kumasi traffic had prepared me for the wildness of the roads.

All of that history, I now understand why it is rightly called the Eternal City.

Gore is fun!

Gore is fun!

Our girls are crazy for ancient Greek gods, so it was a very logical progression to Roman gods. Indeed, in the ancient parts of Rome, they were brilliant tour guides. I was constantly asking; who was the Greek equivalent, of say Minerva (Athena). We visited the Colosseum and with audio guides plastered to our ears, soaked up all the shocking gore of it all. Sustained by gelato alone; we wandered around the Roman Forum; our brains overloading with information. Amazed, really amazed, at the amount of ancient ruins left behind.

Some Indian Magic beside the ancient Roman Forum. What a multicultural world we live in.

Some Indian Magic beside the ancient Roman Forum. What a multicultural world we live in.

And when our brains were full; we just wandered the streets. I can’t tell you how much we love just looking at all the beautiful things, looking at the shops and all the excessive choice and prettiness of the ‘stuff’ in the developed world. Now, that sounds really shallow, but its the truth. I responded with a wry laugh when the children commented that they could build perfect stairs 2000 years ago in Ancient Rome, but they still struggle to do that at a major store in Kumasi.

View from dome of St. Peter's Basilica.

View from dome of St. Peter’s Basilica.

We wisely left a full day for the Vatican. Bill had told us it was awe inspiring, but I thought I’d seen lots of very beautiful churches, and while I’m sure it was amazing, it wasn’t going to blow my socks off. Well, I was wrong. It blew all our socks off. Brain overload was taken to a whole new level. And we’re not even Roman Catholics!

We joined the throngs of people in the Vatican Museum. We followed a Children’s trail  audio guide to highlight the special treasures of a place packed with treasures.

Travelling with children, particularly solo, can be a challenging business. Combining that with trying to lend a sense of perspective and time-scale is really hard. I am going to write a separate post on our successes and failures on travelling with kids, but I really want to give a big shout out to those museums which take the time and effort to make a children’s tour. Kids don’t really care about what school which painter belonged to. They want to know some cool details. Like cannons being melted down to make statues and artists going mad in the process; like when you take the Remus from Romulus and Remus, and combine it with Lupa, the she-wolf who mothered them; you’ll get Remus Lupin. Hello Harry Potter. They want it to be a bit funny; a bit gory; they need to be reminded that the people who made these treasures were just people too. So, a big thanks to the Vatican Museum, whose rooms and corridors of treasures could have been brain numbing; but was fun and relevant.

The hand of God?

The hand of God?

But back to the Vatican. After the museum, we walked back to St. Peter’s Basilica; whose enormity even dwarfed the crowds at the entrance; and the queues moved quickly. Light streamed through the windows above the aisle, and even for a cynic like me; there was a very real sense that this was a holy place. And the opulence of it all, again, was mind blowing. While our necks were aching from staring up, Jock was kneeling down, peering through brass vents on the floor. He could see equally opulent corridors a level below where the priests would walk to get up to the altar.

Another dome, this time inside St. Peter's Basilica.

Another dome, this time inside St. Peter’s Basilica.

Living it up in Rome.

Living it up in Rome.

The fountain of the rivers of the four continents in Piazza Navona. Standing in front of 'Africa' whose head (the Nile) is covered, as the source of the Nile is not known.

The fountain of the rivers of the four continents in Piazza Navona. Standing in front of ‘Africa’ whose head (the Nile) is covered, as the source of the Nile is not known. The girls are watching police chase off street vendors.

Before we knew it we were eating our last gelato at the airport; with suitcases stuffed full of cheese, pasta, wine, prosciutto, artichokes (!) and fresh milk (!!).

Hey, it’s only a 5 hour flight and no Australian quarantine to deal with.

And before I go, I’ve got a question for you, it’s been bugging me for years. Why do we call  cities and countries by their anglicised names? Why do we call it Rome and not Roma? Why Florence and not Firenze? Why Venice and not Venezia? But Sydney is Sydney, and Paris is Paris.

Indeed, why do we call a whole country by a different name? Why do we call it Japan and not Nippon? Why Greece and not Hellas? Don’t you think it’s odd? I’d love an answer.

Three coins in the fountain

The children and I have just spent 9 days in Italy. A big part of me – the responsible-eldest daughter-guilt prone part of me, almost didn’t want to write about it.

After all it seemed, it is, so decadent to spend a week in Italy. The “it’s so expensive”, “we should be saving our money”, “you could just stay at home these holidays”, all those excuses, just melted away when my (wonderful!) husband said “Would you rather spend a week in Konongo, or a week in Italy?”

Click below to watch us at the Trevi Fountain.

And if, in how may years time, Jock again gets to see light stream into the windows of St. Peter’s Basilica, or Cecie gazes across the Duomo, or Lill steps into a gondola, and smiles, and remembers. Then it’s all worthwhile. The world is indeed a beautiful place.

And I hope our children, if all they get out of our travels, is a sense that the world is not only beautiful in all its variety, but accessible too, and nothing to be afraid or intimidated of, then I will be very happy.

Details coming soon… I promise.

How long does the culture shock?

Boys football

I seem to have lost my voice. I think it is due to the reality of our second year, our new living arrangements, and compounded by an absence of the thrill of the new.

Not long after we had first arrived in Ghana, while riding the highs and lows of all that was new and different and exotic, I came across a graph much like this one. Now, stay with me, as geek that I am it gave me great comfort.

The Process of Culture Shock and Cultural Adjustment

 As much as no-one likes to be typecast, this graph matched my experience very clearly. The initial thrill of the new, followed by frustrations and setbacks, culminating in an acceptance of the new life. But unlike other smoothly elegant U shaped graphs, I like the reality of the sharp bumps along the way, as satisfaction bottoms out and starts to rise again. Though on bad days I wonder if the sense of satisfaction in the adaption phase (4) will ever reach such dizzying heights.

The honeymoon phase (1) is indeed like being in love, where everything is new, exotic and exciting. But it is followed by a profund sense of dislocation. All that was rich, or simple or easy about the old life, can be gone, No more playdates, support networks, where the hell are the local shops, why doesn’t it work, this sort of thing wouldn’t happen at home…the level of negativitity can be confronting.

While the inital bottoming out (2) was at times shockingly deep, it is the cultural adjustment phase (3) which has been a complicated affair. In the writing of this blog, and in life in general, I try to stay pretty positive, interested and engaged. I still love watching the life on the streets, and people are, by and large, very friendly. Ghana is a stable and safe society.

Engine shopping

Engine shopping

But there are times, when all those little things, that make for a great story when traveling, become a tiresome slog. The attitude towards inconvenience changes when you are faced with it daily, when you are not a traveler, but a foreigner. The negative experience at the store (where Ghana does not love to shop, you know who you are). The constant low level stress when facing that traffic everyday. Being called obruni on a daily basis. [I bite my tongue, when all I want to say is “Yes, you're right, I am white. Congratulations on you observation skills”]. And plenty of other inconveniences, frustrations, breakages which seem too petty to write about.

And before you are too horrified by me, I am aware of the profound hypocrisy of a ‘rich’ white woman, moaning about her bubble-like existence, in a country she volunteered to move to.

The result of this daily tedium, is that there is a tendency to retreat into your home, to stay inside the bubble. I put things off and miss out on some experiences. Call it self-preservation.

Australia Day, Konongo style

Australia Day, Konongo style

I have had the great experience of meeting some wonderful women since we have moved into Kumasi. Some of which have lived in Ghana for the majority of their adult lives. And every one of them I have spoken to, whether long term expatriates married to a Ghanaian; long term expatriates married to another foreigner, who also call Ghana home; through to the shorter term, more typical expatriates (like ourselves) all admit to retreating into their own bubble. From admitting they spend a lot of time in their garden, to complaining there is no exciting food in the house because they don’t feel up to facing the traffic and the shops, so have a cup of tea for lunch instead (guilty as charged!)

And these challenges, particularly in regional centres, away from capitals (where expats tend to congregate) are often compounded by a profound sense of isolation, when all the usual support networks are gone (and being simultaneously missed). Concerns about healthcare and children adapting; and a spouse that is typically working very long hours. After all, that is commonly why we are here.

And so why would you do it? The reasons are as multifarious as the people you meet in this situation. There are the big reasons people move: for love and family; for work and financial reasons; to expose themselves and their families to a different culture and a different vision to how the world works.

Jock at International Day Celebrations

Jock at International Day Celebrations

And then there are the spinoffs, which are sometimes just what you expected, and range from big to small. Being able to be together as a family to avoid avoiding grueling single parenting schedules. I have spoken to women here who saw their husbands 4 times a year while they were raising children in their home countries. Smaller, although welcome spinoffs, include the chance of some help in the home. Or as we have embraced, the ability to travel. Or the excitement of seeing a different way of life, that can be colourful and exotic.

One of the nicest spinoffs of this life, particularly since the move to Kumasi, has been the variety of people we have met. Everyone has their own story to tell. Their own reasons and their own experiences.

I, and I think most women, find the need to share, support and just talk to each other very important. One of the hardest things in settling in was losing my support network of great women.

Fittingly, a chance meeting on International Women’s Day this year, brought together several expat women in Kumasi. And something as simple and profound as a group of women chatting together has made everything seem much more ‘normal’. And indeed, has helped smooth those bumps on the graph into something a little more elegant.

Bushwalking over the Easter weekend

Bushwalking over the Easter weekend

I hope everyone had a great long Easter weekend. We’re on school break for a few weeks, with some very exciting plans!